Yosemite, July 2010

In July, I went to Yosemite with some friends. I had gone just a few weeks before with Kelley, but it was amazing how things had changed in those few weeks. Most of the heavy snow had obviously melted long before, as the waterfalls, although still very full, were nothing like the previous trip. There's a bridge at Lower Yosemite Falls that I stood on and nearly froze to death from the mist the last time, but I don't think I even got a slight mist this trip.


Half dome! Always amazing!!!


After hiking up a bit, I sat here for almost an hour. It was bliss. I just felt so comfortable. This area must have been under freezing water when I went there the month before, but the weather was just perfect and the rocks were actually very comfortable. Bliss!


Lower Yosemite Falls


Half Dome looked awesome in the setting sun


The crew I went with

One of the most haunting songs

While I was in the shower this morning, I heard one more time the song 'Cats in the Cradle' and I realized that this is one of the most haunting songs there is. It really hit me how we have to take advantage of our time with our families. Of course, I don't have any children (yet), but I think about how quickly my niece and oldest nephew grew up and look at my nephews now. I want to spend so much time with them, although it's difficult with spending time with family, ex-in laws, as well as new in-laws that treat the kids as their own grandparents. And I love spending time with my parents.

Since my last real post

Well, let's see, since my last real post, I've gone to Yosemite twice (awesome pics that I planned on sharing. I've also gone to Hawaii. I really need to show some of those pics. I've been at my house for over a year now. I still miss my old ward. Being in the Primary is not the easiest way to get to know people in a new ward. Especially since they split Primary, so I only interact with about seven adults most Sundays.

And I really need to start finding and hanging out with some fellow midsingles. Time to listen to Keturah and go with her to some of these activities.

My job is going alright. I'm still on the bottom (tied) of my seniority list at work, but I think I'll be alright.

And I'm planning on another trip to Hawaii. I wanted to go with Kelley again when she goes in January, but by the time I looked at tickets, they were over $600 (she got an awesome deal for about $300). I kept looking, but couldn't find anything cheaper than $600 for that timeframe. But then another friend told me she wanted to go again, and after checking a bit longer, decided to go with her. So I will be going again.

Last year at this time, my Mom and I were excited to be going on our trip to the Mediterranean. It was such an awesome trip, that we both miss it a lot. So, we're looking at going that way again or go on a trip to Israel. Hey, sometimes being single is fun (my mom's not single, but my dad doesn't like to cruise).

Why the lack of posts

I haven't posted much because my laptops suck. Yep, laptopS! I accidentally stepped on my screen of my laptop a few months ago. Now I can only use that one in my bedroom when it's hooked up to my TV. I bought a replacement one, but it's been a lemon, and I need to reinstall Windows and hope that helps everything. So being on the Internet hasn't been convenient at home. and I've been busy on Facebook or iTunes when I'm at my bedroom computer. Hopefully when I get the other one fixed I'll post more. I had meant to put up pictures on both my recent trips to Yosemite and my brother's wedding. Hopefully I'll get to those. I have to put up pictures from my next trip, Hawaii!

Can it really be only a year?

It seems like it's been forever since I've had my little Jewely with me. But indeed tomorrow is the one year anniversary of the loss of my little Jewely. I miss her so much. I don't like dwelling on such a sad time, but with her death being right after Independence Day, it's easy to remember, as it is with Diego's, a few days before Halloween.

Jewely, I love you, miss you, and think about you all the time. I know you'll be there to greet me some day when it's my turn to cross over. Goodbye, my love.

http://disneycoug.blogspot.com/2009/07/life-and-meaning-of-jewely-gilson.html

A bit rusty here

Wow, it's been awhile. I'm not in the midst of a mouse hunt. I have a mouse in my house. He's been here about a month, but he's only recently really bugged me. He's killed two plants of mine (the first one was my Mother's Day flower from last year, the first plant I had that was going to live more than a year. That made me mad.

I'm also trying to get my house painted, my large tree stump removed from my front yard, and new furniture. I just need people to help. I need someone to help with the tree stump removal and helping move the furniture inside. I wouldn't mind help with the painting as well. Maybe I'll see if some friends on Facebook would be willing to help.

The only thing constant....

Dealing with change is so difficult for me. I think it's often difficult for everyone, but when you're single, it can be even more so. I've always been bad at saying goodbye - it tears me up inside. I remember many years ago when my uncle, aunt, and cousin came to visit from Washington. We had a lot of fun, but as they left, I remember just being so sad, because I didn't know when I'd see them again. And all through my life, I'm always sad when not only friends leave, but when I know situations won't ever be the same again.

Like, I could always move back to Provo, but it will never be the same as when I was there going to BYU. Not that it wouldn't be good - just that it would be far different.

Even with the Gospel perspective, I have a hard time with change. When my grandpa died, I was of course comforted to know that I'll see him again, but I was sad. It'll be my grandpa when he was younger (most likely), not my cute ol' grandpa.

Over the years, I've had many friends move away or leave for a time and season. It's always so tough for me. Friends get married, they move away, and I'm still here. It's not that tough being single when you have friends to do things with. But sometimes I feel that everyone is either leaving or moving on, and I'm left alone. Last summer I felt that way, as friends moved away and every single person I call a close friend got into a relationship, even some that never had before. I went into a depression, feeling so much like I was alone. If I had gotten my head out of my #@% I would have realized that even though my friends were busy, they still had time for me. In fact, some were almost begging to let them help me in my move, but I didn't let them. I kept thinking they were busy. Anyway, this is a side note.

And now another summer is approaching. With it comes friends returning from school, but also graduation and other trips that take friends away. I miss my routine. I miss the past. I miss how things used to be.

Change is always hard, but I know it makes us all stronger. We are beings that must adapt, that need to adapt. But it's hard.

Really getting into baseball

Since I was a little girl watching Will Clark and the San Francisco Giants, I have been a fan of the Giants. However, baseball was never really my thing, so even after moving to the SF Bay Area, I hardly went to any games at the new (then called) Pac Bell Park. It actually took until a company sponsored trip for a project that we completed that I went to my first game. We took the ferry and made it to sit in the left field cheap seats. Only problem - the Giants had secured a postseason birth the day before, so we were basically watching a Triple A team play.

Still, I enjoyed it, but didn't get back to watch a game until last year when I went with my brother and his kids for my nephew's birthday. We lost to the Dodgers, but I really enjoyed myself.

This year I find myself really interested in baseball. The Giants are supposed to have a pretty good team, but I think I just find myself nostalgic for the game. Baseball games don't have the intensity of football games. They are more laid back, but with exciting moments. And I'm really craving that this year. So I've already gone to one game this year, another loss - the Giants one and only loss until last night. And I plan on going to more. I want to go to a daytime game sometime soon. I don't have a ton of money to go to games, but I do want to go to some more, and maybe even pay a bit extra to sit in a different area, in order to enjoy a different aspect of the game.

So you might see some posts about that this year. Hopefully the Giants do well, but I'll be enjoying them either way.

By the way, I know they keep losing when I go, but I REALLY don't think it's because of me. I have a feeling the Giants have absolutely no clue that I'm there. And thanks for going with me, Kelley. It was a lot of fun, even though we lost!

A simple thing can mean so much

Last Sunday I was at church (well, my second ward - I've been going to two wards for the past four weeks) and after Sunday School saw a friend out of the corner of my eye. I reached over to give her a hug and I think just said something like, "Hi! It's great to see you" and then went on with whatever it was I was doing. I don't think that I asked her how she was doing or anything, just a simple hug.

She wrote on my Facebook later that she really needed that hug more than I could ever know. Now, anyone who knows me knows I'm a hugger. I love hugs, and don't get them enough, so I'll give a hug to anyone who wants one and will try giving hugs to anyone I think is accepting of one, so it's not unusual for this to have happened, but it really makes me think of how simple gestures can have profound impacts on someone. I'm glad I was able to brighten her day, if just a little.

It's a reminder to me how important it is to do those simple things you might not think are that important, like a smile, a simple "Hello!" or a hug. Of course it would have been better if I took more time to talk with her and catch up, but at least that quick 10 to 15 second thing was able to help her in some way. I hope I can remember that and take the time to be there for others when they need something like a hug or a smile.

I am selfish

You know, I was thinking of my last post and realized I am dang selfish. I have to admit when I hear a friend has broken up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, one of the thoughts that crosses my mind is, "Oh good, they'll have more time to hang out with me." Of course, I feel bad for them and try to comfort them, but I do think about how this will benefit me.

I of course want my friends to be happy. I want them to get married and have families. Of course that's what I want too. But it is nice that since I'm single, I have single friends to do things with.

I need to stop worrying about what will benefit me and just try to be a better friend to my friends - to be more supportive and unconditionally love them.